ICYHOT.

So late last night, (or was it early this morning???), I experienced the ULTIMATE fail (even tho I don't allow the kids to say that word). Sigh. In lieu of playing the role of 'Cousin Effect's' visit to the SRT last Saturday to teach the kids about Cause and Effect, I shall write this post in cause and effect format.

BECAUSE Georgia has decided to descend upon the city of New York causing the temperatures and humidity levels to rise beyond what I agreed with God about when I moved up North, running has been completely painful. Plus, no one has bought me the fuel belt I want yet. And I can't buy one for myself because I can't make up my mind on which one I want. So, my wonderful fiance who has not yet been eaten by Dingos bought me a present. This present was bought BECAUSE I have gone a few weeks with only drinking 1.5 diet cokes....which makes about 36 less than I usually drink in two weeks...at least.

So my present is a Jillian Michaels workout DVD to use to get in some good cardio even when I can't go outside to run int he extreme heat. And BECAUSE I love working out, I decided to do the DVD yesterday, but BECAUSE I hate stretching, I guess I didn't stretch enough???? I don't know....and somehow, I ended up with some strange ache that stretches from 3/4 up my back to my right shoulder and keeps me from turning my head.

So I tried to convince Jesse to massage it last night, but because I was whining and being annoying, and BECAUSE he'd just finished doing my laundry, he just told me to put BenGay on it when I got home.....

So when I got home, I forgot. I went to sleep instead. But I awoke to pee in the middle of the night and my back/neck was KILLING me. So I stumbled over to the counter and pulled out my ICYHOT because I don't have bengay. I squirted some out and slapped it on my back and rubbed it around, but not very carefully, so I like coated myself thoroughly....and then.....

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH i felt like Kevin on Home Alone. I'm not even kidding. It hurt so bad. It was like knives going into my skin. 'I used too much I used too much I used too much' i thought to myself. I tried to wipe it off, but I had ICYHOT all over both hands, so I ran to the bathroom, half asleep, and tried to get it off with a wet cloth. That semi worked. But I finally ended up just laying on my bed while knives stabbed me thinking to myself all the reasons why I was in this position....and so I made the chain:

5. ICYHOT ATTACK MIDDLE OF NIGHT
a. Too lazy too put on before bed
b. because i had bf do laundry so he wouldn't give massage >.<
4. because I didn't stretch??? this is only a maybe
3. because i did jillian michaels
a. because she apparently hates upper backs and shoulders
2. because i got it as a gift
a. because it is soooo hot outside
b. because i stopped drinking diet coke
1. BECAUSE I LIVE IN NY. well, this would be true in Georgia too.