God Provides the Knife

Play video as you read....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KoYWDCwxExs

As I was spending time with God this morning, I couldn’t shake this ‘distant’ feeling. I immediately started asking “what sin is there, God, that I need to repent of?” Then I went to analyzing every action of the past few days and trying to dissect feelings and priorities in my heart. This is quite frequently my course of action when I ‘feel’ distant, but as I was praying and listening to Jeremy Camp’s Wonderful Maker,” I was reminded of God’s love for me and the temptation that Satan puts upon us constantly to earn our acceptance and approval and closeness with God. Then I remembered Kim’s comment to me last night as I was stressing about the pain my poor little Jirem would go through today when he had his surgery (he’s getting ‘fixed’). I was saying how awful I felt that I was LETTING this happen to him when I didn’t HAVE to. I’m letting it happen, though, because it’s FOR HIS OWN good. Kim said, “awww, this must be how God feels when we go through pain that He knows is good for us.”

So as I was feeling ‘distant,’ all these thoughts crossed my mind, and I was overwhelmed with the fact that GOD LOVES me. God is not standing there with a ‘bar’ and saying “you haven’t reached it Megin! Repent and try harder!” Now, don’t get me wrong. Repentance is GOOD and NEEDED. Holiness is GOOD. But, the fact of the matter is that SOOOO often we listen to ACCUSATIONS of Satan and let that make us feel so distant when Jesus is standing right there saying, ‘Remember me?? Remember how I GOT salvation for you?? Don’t you know that I LOVE you!!!!’ We just can’t get it. It’s too hard to comprehend.

Oswald Chambers’ devotion for today is about Matthew 6:25-33….taking no thought for our life…abandoning to Jesus….NOT worrying. We even tend to read those verse legalistically and allow them to ACCUSE us instead of realizing that they are SCREAMING God’s love to us. We don’t HAVE to take thought for our life because God loves us! Won’t one who loves another take thought for their needs FOR them? Ok, dog analogy again: Jirem doesn’t have to worry about his food or being taken out or toys or anything- I PROVIDE THOSE. I love him, and any mistakes I make with loving him or treating him well come because I AM A SINNER WHO CAN’T LOVE PERFECTLY. God, however, doesn’t make mistakes with us. He is perfect- the perfect one of love who loves us perfectly. Then I thought, God delights in ME the way I delight in Jirem. Now you guys KNOW just how crazy I am about Jirem…imagine that- God delights in us that way…and more.

So those thoughts brought me back around to the question that many of my friends have been struggling with since last Sunday. “Who is God that He PROVIDES the knife??” That is ‘offensive,’ I hear- the fact that God provides the knife with which our ‘friend’ backstabs us. Elisabeth Elliot has a perfect quote to explain this, however. “God never did anything TO me that He didn’t do FOR me.” My money provides the scalpel with which Jirem will endure pain today; however, I am not doing anything TO him that is not FOR him. God sent His only son for us because of His character and His desire to be in relationship with us. He will not send His son to save us only to then make our lives miserable for no reason or without completely GOOD and WONDERFUL purposes.

I can, therefore, spend my life one of two ways….in apprehension of what God may PROVIDE to people with which they can hurt me….OR….trusting that GOD IS GOOD and thus GOD LOVES ME and WILL TAKE CARE OF ME. I recall even all the pain of my life thus far, and God in His gracious mercy has given me ample opportunity to see how He has used it FOR me and not just done it TO me. Sure, there is much I still do not know…much I may never know this side of heaven, but the question is, ‘do I trust Jesus?’ Trusting Jesus is a hard thing, however, in that we cannot trust Him until we REALLY know His character. Unfortunately, Satan has done a wonderful job at confusing our perception and understanding of God. I mean, as a previous post says, we can’t understand even what it means that God loves us because very few of us even have mediocre earthly examples of love around us. And then, as we face pain and trials, what is there to think but that we are being punished or that God is one who enjoys inflicting pain upon us? With the lies of Satan rampant in this world, it is the natural thing to think and the thing that, sadly enough, makes the most ‘logical’ sense to our human minds. Our challenge is to be able to join our perception which is ‘bad’ with the truth which is ‘God is good.’ That challenge is EVEN HARDER in the face of tragedies such as the death of a child or the completely undeserved infliction of pain on our lives and hearts because of the sin of others. Hmmm, I do know the hardness.

But, no eye has fully seen how beautiful the Cross, and we have only heard the faintest whispers of how great He is…

God gave the cross to the soldiers for Jesus to be crucified upon…the nails to be driven into His wrists and ankles. Jesus gave Judas the permission and command to go and betray Him and to do it ‘quickly.’ God provided the apple that Adam and Eve ate. God provided the serpent for Satan to inhabit. God required that Jepthah carry out His promise and murder his daughter. Do we allow these things to make us doubt the character of God? If your answer is ‘yes,’ continue to seek God that He may reveal and deeper understanding of His character to you. If your answer is ‘no,’ then do not doubt when God allows/provides the weapons of this world which harm you.

This I know to be true, God never does anything to us that He does not do for us. Fear not; take no thought for you life. God LOVES you. He clothes even the grass. What good thing shall He withhold from you, His child in whom He delights? No good thing shall He withhold. Humble is His love…strength like no other…to allow pain in His children so that they too may become like His son who was made perfect through suffering.

Our lives are hidden with Christ, secured with Him. May the cares of this world- the cares concerning the knives and weapons, may they be abandoned and entrusted to God’s character, goodness, mercy, and wisdom…lest they choke the life of the Spirit right out of us.

Amen