Headed Up-State

Life is not perfect- my life at least. Marriage is not easy- our marriage at least. It is not all-satisfying and completely romantic and all those other things I dreamed it was when I was a teenager.... And I find that my eyes tend to focus on these two facts a lot, or upon what I do not have and wish I had. What remains unfulfilled even though I would prefer it fulfilled and think, 'don't I deserve it to be?'

But I am reminded of this today: Jesse and I are headed up to Camp Mariah to co-lead a workshop (Called Going Deeper with God) for Teen Eastern Chinese Bible Conference. (I think that's the name. Everyone just calls it ECBC or TECBC. hehe). And as I did my morning devotions, I remembered back when I would go to youth conferences in college, or travel on short term trips with ELIC, and when I'd see couples teaching together, both hands-on, working to help us young people, or serving as leaders of teams heading overseas. And I remembered how I hoped in my soul I could be like them.

And I suppose the 'hardness' of day-to-day life, and stress, and arguments, and Jesse and me trying to figure out how to merge our two completely different ways of thinking and approaching things together into one, can be used as a temptation of Satan that I give into and then forget that I have what I wanted. God led my life in a direction and brought me to be one of those people I wanted to be... even though somehow along the way I managed not even to realize that that is what He was doing.

Righteous desires, those in accord with His will, He fulfills. Psalm 145:19, Matthew 5:6, Proverbs 10:22, and an abundant more verses!

Pray for us this weekend. We'll be leading two workshops. We have about 6 of our own CC youth coming with us. (or is it 5? I should make sure I know that I suppose. ha!) We'll be back Monday.